Jets Soar Over Vikings 30-27
It's official, the New York Jets are the 56-57 UCAS League champions. Coming on strong from the beginning, New York seemed to own the first half of the game. From Hiram Epstien's fantastic touchdown return from the opening kickoff to the excellent capitialization on the score of turnovers in the second quarter, the Jet's seemed to walk all over the Vikings. Despite an impressive fourth quarter rally, Minnesota failed to catch up to the Jets' powerful start.
Minnesota's star runningback, Katrina Holden, distinguished herself as usual. From recovering her own team's fumble and running 120 yards for a touchdown to punching straight through New Yorks formidable defensive line to score Minnesota's final seven points, the 5'7" Holden seemed to be personally carrying Vikings through much of the second half. "We didn't lose because I'm a woman" she told ASN reporters "we lost 'cause the rest of my team isn't". Of course many point to Alan Aekers, Minnesota's second string quarterback as the reason for the many turnovers and poor planning. It's an open secret that Aekers, unlike injured QB Alan Corman, dislikes Holden and fails to utilize Minnesota's best offensive asset. As Coreman's allergy to his recently installed bone-lacing is due to keep him down for next season as well, it is unknown at this point what the Viking's managment will do about the situation.
The UCAS champion Jets will now go on to face the Freedom League champion Richmond Generals in the Superbowl in Jacksonville CAS on the 24th.
6 comments:
I heard Sparatan Cybersystems was putting something top secret into his arm.
Allergy? Whatever. Corman's got so much cyber that it's amazing he's held on this long.
I got one word for y'all: CyberZombie.
I agree, the Jets kicked hoop and all the media does is play up fraggin' Holden just cause she's the only chica in the league that doesn't habitually warm a bench. We get it, she doesn't suck! They still lost! The Jets rule!
Wow it'd be fraggin great if these articles were actually written by a sports writer that actually knew anything about sports. The last time I checked the football team for Richmond was the fraggin RAIDERS. Makes an orc wonder if they even watch these damn games before they write about em.
And Richmond's gonna dominate.
Fraggin' UCAS faxes do it every year, Bloodwrath. They intentionally frag with the Freedom League Champion's name (last year they said the wrong team, in '55 they said a Florida high school football team won). It's juvenile but it's been going on since the league broke up after the horse-fraggin' savages stole half of the country. CAS faxes do it to. Here's a clip from the Southern Sentinel: "After defeating Minnesota, New York is heading to the Superbowl. The Stewardesses can expect to be defeated soundly by Raiders, later this month." It's kind of a tradition really.
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